Less and Less

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It seems like a million years ago that I was doing CHR (Top 40) radio.  I have to admit though, I really did enjoy it back in the day.  It was exciting and new and fun and, well, just a really kick ass way to spend some time.

So anyway, I was going through some unlabeled CDs last night and I stumbled on this jem.  It is an aircheck of me on G105 from November 2003.  I sound totally different here than I do on 96 Rock.  (At least I hope I do!)  And yes, I realize how pukey (radio lingo!) I sound.  Either way, was fun to listen to.  Please enjoy and criticize all you want. 

I read an article today warning people about going to Tijuana for bariatric surgery. The gist of the article was that "you get what you pay for" and "American doctors are better" and "don't be stupid and go to Mexico" and several other extremist/ill-informed comments. It was the type of article that if read by someone on the fence about having surgery could be the thing that turns them off. This really bummed me out because seven weeks I went to Mexico and had bariatric surgery and it has been the absolute best decision I have ever made.

Seven weeks ago, I weighed 394 lbs, wore size 56 pants, 4x/5x shirts, sweated almost constantly unless I was perfectly still, ate an obscene amount of food, never exercised and generally felt like crap all the time.

Seven weeks ago, I got on a plane and flew over 3000 miles to another country to let a surgeon cut into me with absolutely no fear whatsoever.

Seven weeks ago, I was privileged to be cared for by a staff that was courteous, friendly, and as thorough as any medical staff I have EVER dealt with in the United States.

Seven weeks ago, I changed my life.

So where am I seven weeks later? As of this morning, I weighed 338.8 lbs, a loss of 55.2 lbs! I am down to a 48 pants size and 3x shirts. I exercise almost every day and have even started running(!). I eat probably half a cup of food for each meal and am getting probably less than a sixth of the calories I used to eat (and it is all fresh, home cooked food, no take out/fast food.) I feel better than I have in YEARS.

And it is all going to keep improving. That is the crazy thing. As good as I feel right now, I know that I will feel even better in seven more weeks. I will get to my goal and I will live a life that I have never actually known. It's intoxicating to even consider.

I wish that I could talk to the person that reads that article and decides against going ahead with Lap Band or something else and tell them not to believe everything they read. Research your doctor regardless of where they are because that good reputation is something that CAN exist across the border. It is possible to go to Tijuana and come away changed for the better.

I am living proof.

I started solids this past weekend and so far, so good! I have no experienced any PB'ing as yet and have been feeling full on very small portions. And the scale has backed this up as I have been able to lose close to 5 lbs. so far this week. So all in all, the transition to solids has been successful.

But let me tell you what has been the most exciting thing I have discovered since moving to solids: flavors. It has been astounding the things I have been able to taste. I think there are two reasons for this rebirth of flavor in my life.

One, having been on a three week liquid diet (with only a week's worth of creamy soups at that) I think damn near anything would have tasted good. Let's not kid ourselves and pretend that a bowl of broth sets our mouth's ablaze. That three week food vacation seems to have "reset" my taste buds to some degree. Even things that I am very familiar with somehow have a stronger taste than before, which I guess could be mental, but still!

Two, it occurred to me that my previous diet was very, very, very stale. I was living off of a mixture of pizza, burgers and subs. That is all I ever ate. And there is only so much flavor available from fast food/delivery places. Not only did this diet contribute directly to my weight problem, but it seems like it killed my ability to discern subtle flavors in things. That problem has now been solved.

So far, I have enjoyed some delicious roast beef hash with egg, some tilapia, broccoli, watermelon, steak and that is just the beginning! The foods on the horizon will be both flavorful, healthy, portioned properly and will, ultimately, lead me to my goal.

Yesterday afternoon, as I was enjoying the thunderstorm outside, I decided that I should go through my very overpacked closet and pare things down. I had been planning to do that for ages because there were many things in there that I just simply do not wear anymore. However, there were two additional things that happened that I really didn't expect.

First off, I started looking at my winter clothes and realized that I likely would never wear some of these items ever again. This was a pretty shocking thing for me. I love hooded sweatshirts and there were 5 or 6 in there that are just simply going to be too big by the time we get back to cold weather around these parts. I will admit there was a tiny twinge of sadness or whatever in seeing these things go because they had been my "fat shield" for years. (nothing like baggy clothes to make people think you aren't fat, right!) That feeling passed very quickly as I realized that I won't NEED that "fat shield" anymore. It was pretty awesome.

Second, I found several items of clothing in my closet that I had outgrown but that now fit just fine. In fact, there were 2 concert t-shirts that I had bought a few years ago from my favorite band that I never wore because they were too tight. I got them simply because they were unique and I wanted to hope that one day I would be able to wear them. That day was yesterday because I tried them on and they both fit great! To say I was happy would be a colossal understatement. Even better is the fact that I know I will be outgrowing (undergrowing?) them in a month or two as I continue to lose. It's just amazing so far. Two weeks in and I loving it!

(Also, can you get over how much room fat people clothes take in the closet?? Holy hell, I feel like I have a whole new closet available to me.)

It's amazing how easy this journey has been so far. Now, granted, I am only a week post-op and there are so many challenges ahead that I haven't experienced that it is possible that my attitude will change, but for now, I am cruising along rather nicely.

So let's get the stats out of the way:

Decision Weight (3/1/10): 420.2 lbs
Weight at booking (3/17/10): 413.4 lbs
Surgery Weight (5/7/10): 394.0 lbs
Current Weight (5/13/10): 379.6 lbs

Down 40.6 from peak.
Down 33.8 from booking.
Down 14.4 from surgery.

So, as you can see, this has been a pretty good thing thus far and I am ridiculously pleased.

I am coming to the end of the clear liquid phase and will be incorporating liquid yogurt into my diet tomorrow. Any change is good, and I am looking forward to trying something new. (Oddly, I chewed a piece of gum yesterday for the first time in a couple of weeks and realized that it was the first time I had chewed something in over a week. Weird sensation.)

So where am I at now? I am still looking to the future and hope that what Dr. Ortiz said to me before doing my surgery holds true. He said that if I were to follow all the rules that it would be possible that I could lose up to 68 lbs prior to my first fill. Now, I am not a fool and that seems incredibly "pie in the sky", but man, if I can get anywhere CLOSE to that I will be over the moon!

I have been taking it sort-of easy on the exercise front this week as my incisions heal. I have walked some, but nothing crazy. However, things are starting to feel better and I am ready to start exercising more regularly. I know that this will help me in the loss column (and the "feeling awesome" column) so it HAS to be done. I will see what happens as I ramp up.

So there you go. One week in and I feel great! I am excited, I am motivated and I *am* going to succeed.

Here I am, 13 or so hours away from something pretty big happening.  I am pretty nervous about the whole thing if I must be honest.  I mean, I know everything is going to be fine and I am going to be fine, but that hasn't really quelled my trepidation about what I am about to do.  Don't get me wrong, I am very comfortable with the decision but the machinations of that decision are pretty daunting!  I guess I will find out just how daunting in 13 hours. 

Wish me luck.

So basically I ate something that wasn't on my diet and I am sure it
has acted as a small bump in the road when it comes to my progress.
However, at the end of the day that is all it was... a speed bump. I
have one month left to lose about 11 more pounds and I know I am going
to succeed. Odds are good that I will go out to eat one or two more
times prior to the date looming on the calendar. I will endeavor to
make good choices, but no promises at this time.

But that time is coming and very, very soon.

So it is this challenge that I am trying to overcome right now. I
want to do well, honestly, but it is amazing how difficult that can be
when it comes to trying to eat something quickly or on the go. I
suppose I will have to figure this out. I mean, I don't have a choice
so it WILL get done.

On the plus side, even eating out today, I didn't do too bad. Not
perfect by any stretch, but not terrible either. And the rest of the
day has gone well too. Thank god for popsicles!